Wednesday, March 21, 2012

March 21, 2012

Today was an interesting day. I woke up feeling crummy and then as the day went on I felt better. I have ended the day with my upper body hurting really good. I have had stress from all the drama in the house so perhaps this is why I feel like garbage.

I am going to a new Physical Therapist on Friday which is good since I'm starting to go into reverse. I bought 20 2 liter bottles of water for our emergency water storage and I didn't feel so good after lifting them into the cart so this tells me that my body isn't liking that at all. We are now paying out of pocket for my PT so this is an added expense that we now have. I'm hoping to do well and gain normal mobility. I'm trying to learn and be okay with the speed of this recovery. I just want it over with and was brought down to earth that this takes a lot of time. I know I know well maybe I really don't know anything.

I am still adjusting to my glasses but I think they are keepers. I got my Prada case yesterday which is great since it came with a little cleaning cloth too. It's a nice case and it's possible to hold another pair of glasses. I may have to get transitional options for my lenses.

Today I missed Co-op but hope to make it to park on Friday. I'm sure I'll be exhausted with PT in the middle of park but good that I'll be in the area. Paxton has been acting out a lot but after the past year I can't say that I blame him much. He is such an emotional kid and extra sensitive while being tough. I think we forget how tender kids hearts are and how they want to make things better while feeling helpless at the same time.

I'm working and have been working on our yearbook pages. I'm done with a good part of all of them so hopefully I complete them in the next week or so rather than the last minute.

I love homeschooling my boys and I'm blessed to have a fabulous hubby that allows me to do this. He is a great leader of our family and makes me feel so safe.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Here is to a better week!

I'm still awake and still exhausted from this past week. We had a power outage last night and I was disturbed while sleeping to give me updates of how that was going and yes it was during sleeping hours. I just try to not stress out about things like this when it's dark outside. It did get me thinking about few things which was great but then I started to overthink.

I found a wonderful wood table with great wood chairs that would be a great repurpose project. I emailed the people that have it on Craigslist so I'm hoping to hear back from them. I like the chairs more than anything. They have tons of potential.

I'm still so tired so there isn't really anything new to report at this point but I vowed to myself that I will try to post daily or close to it. I'm working on designing a patio garden for my front patio this weekend. We really want a wonderful colorful area to sit and enjoy along with something beautiful to look at. I think our family and neighbors will love it.

I hope all is well with everyone and that you join my blog to hear all the exciting things we have planned for the spring/summer. I don't promise anything but I really hope to do some awesome projects or should I say WE. I get the ideas and put everyone to work putting them together. I really can't wait to use power tools again.

I'm on week two with my new glasses and I've decided to keep them. They are nice, stylish, Prada (lol) and work better than the readers I was using.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

What a Week!

This week has been such a tough week for me. I've been unable to focus and feel good. I've tried very hard to change my mood and additude by mind over matter but it isn't working too well for me. I've been so fatigued that I'm having trouble doing anything. Its rough when you have constant meltdowns. Hey, am I a toddler or something? I'm kidding of course but I've been feeling childlike in that way. I have so much in my life that is wonderful so I feel completely bad feeling anything but wonderful. Unfortunantly I don't feel so wonderful.

We are repurposing these cabinets we got from a kitchen remodel and finding a temporary countertop has been so challenging. We intend to spend under $100 but have it look like we spent so much more. I think we found a solution and I'll post photos when it's done. We put wood down and added trim to the edges so far and it has transformed a tiny kitchen into a grand space. It's going to be wonderful when it is finished. I'm on a mission to be organized in this small house. I've got some great stuff to work with so I'm excited to pull it together and make it beautiful.

I've got a huge list of projects but unfortunantly my body isn't too excited about any of it. I'm regretting my activity from this past week because I'm paying for it now. I use to do so many things so this is a huge adjustment for my family. I really wish my mom was here.

I'm hoping to get my patio garden started next weekend and a plan for the smaller projects that can be done over longer periods of time so I never have the problems I've had this week. I want pretty things around me that smell good. Roses, roses, gardenias, and more is all I want to smell and see.

Its going to fun to plan the spring and summer activities because I'm hoping to do something great and fun. I can't hike but I would love to go camping. I hope you have some fun activities planned. Share if you do because we would love to hear all about it.

Monday, March 12, 2012

A tired day!!

Today is a day of being super tired. These are discouraging days when I accomplish something and then feel defeated the next day because I'm so tired and fatigued. I know this is part of the process but still a little discouraged. I did a little more cleaning this morning but quickly began to get shakey.

The temporary countertop is just amazing and really shows off the counters and new storage space. It will be great to have things run smoothly and in its place.

I made an appointment with the new physical therapy place that will working on me from now on and I'm rather excited. I've been hurting a lot this week to the point where reading is difficult. I'm looking forward to working hard to the next level and I think Jenn Lee can do that for me. She was amazing the last time I went to her and communicates very well. It will be worth the drive into Goodyear as I will be coordinating it with other activities we have going on. I plan to look for a new gym also and we are considering going back to Lifetime Fitness. They have an amazing facility and a location in Scottsdale. We loved it there when we were previous members. I know they have what I need to reach the next level to recovery.

Today I'm hurting in the head, neck, and very dizzy. The arm is numb and I was very fatigued. I'm glad that I served leftovers tonight for dinner because I don't think I could have cooked dinner.

Tomorrow is a new day with new blessings. I know there will be challenges but the blessings I'm sure will be huge.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

New Me, New Life!

I've been talking about being normal or longing to be normal again. The loving friends I have in my life reminded me about what was broken in my life, mind and body. It was suggested that I think about the new and improved me and I've decided to focus on this rather than go back to the broken girl I use to be. I've decided that this perspective was so wonderful that I would indeed focus on this from now on. I've been through so much and although I have not shared this on my blog, I have been encouraged to do this more often. People learn so much from other peoples experiences and I'm hoping that I can inspire or encourage someone along the way.

Last week I went on my six month visit with my surgeon who reminded me that I had major major surgery and that it was completely normal to tire easily. I guess I expect more from myself and I've been told that I'm doing very well despite all my challenges. The challenges I have is the numbness of my right hand and arm, numbness in my legs and the face and head hurting often. I am doing more and more each week with another year of physical therapy without knowing what that final outcome will be. The unknown is scary and I try really hard to put that out of my mind. I can't handle certain sounds very well and any drama in the house is super tough for me to handle. How does one parent teenage boys and avoid drama? My family is rock solid and I'm lucky to have that rock solid marriage that can handle this kind of bump in the road. I just celebrated 25 years of marriage on February 21st. I can't imagine life without my hubby, he is amazing. God blessed me with the right man to live my life, grow old and have children with all these years. If you can go through all that we have gone through and stay this crazy over each other then you are so blessed. My children are amazing, they really make me proud to be their mom on so many levels. I want them to know that I will be their greatest fan no matter what they do with their lives as long as they are happy, healthy and keep their values.

I appreciate all my friends, old, new and distant. I can't tell you enough times how much I love you all. I really don't think I could have handled all this without you. You encourage me when I'm down or scared, you pray for me when I'm too tired to pray myself, you love me when I'm crankie, build me up when I feel insecure, you laugh at my jokes and laugh with me when I'm really not wanting to laugh. I've been told that I'm strong, amazing and inspiring. I'm starting to believe this and with happy tears I'm getting stronger and stronger in my mind to take on new adventures. I might get well enough to write that book for the boys. They still love my stories.

Thanks for inspiring me, loving me and always praying for me!